Thursday, December 12, 2013

More Elevators

What? You haven't had enough of the tales of me acting a fool in the elevator?


A few weeks ago, I was riding back up to my office after lunch when a man got in after me. He was holding a stack of seven pizzas. There was already another man in the elevator with HIS lunch, a styrofoam container in a plastic bag, and a bunch of other people without any food, like me. I said to the group:

"Oh Man if this elevator gets stuck it's gonna get crazy in here." And then I dug in my purse to find my keys and put them in my hand, you know like how they tell you to do when you're walking alone at night so you can fend off rapists and muggers:


And then I lowered myself into this offensive "every-man-for-himself-elevator's-stuck-I'll-kill-you-for-that-pizza" stance right here:

It's not always a Victoria's Secret fashion show at my place, you know.

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