Thursday, September 18, 2014

Shash-age Links

I didn't even read this one, but there are SOUTH KOREAN BABIES IN CERAMIC POTS in the photo. Something about "under 5 mortality". BLAH BLAH BLAH Probably very interesting. The photo!

Best Countries for solo travelers. I've been to all but the Netherlands and Switzerland. Colombia isn't on there, but I'm going anyway. Sola en diciembre.

Disgusting! This is why we should all go back to having pagers. Don't let your abusive ex get at your phone, y'all!

Probably not really all that real and maybe sensationalist, but why are you microwaving things anyway? Do you really not have an extra ten minutes and a sauce pot?

This is hard for me because I'm sure I would have also really been "in heaven being a mom" and that I would also never have "been happier" and "just in awe of this beautiful person" we created and that it also would have been a "special time" for me and that my life would have "completely changed" once I "became pregnant", but you know, congrats, Ryan and Eva. I give up. You win. I'll find somebody else to have a celebrity crush on. I'm looking at you, Damon Albarn or, guy from Homeland.

This one's for you Roxie...our favorite show and your favorite pearl white slimline telephone with last number redial:


Jenny said...

I always love your roundup, but I had to get out of bed to comment on this one. I totally disagree about the NPR phone article being sensationalist.

When I read the article earlier today I went "Duh! Of course! How silly that they think this is news!" and then reminded myself that this type of situation is hidden pretty well and not talked about. I assure you that most victims of domestic violence are fully aware of what they can and can't do based on their phone (at least in terms of what will and will not piss off their abuser - but it's dangerous if they don't actually know the functions their phone does without their knowledge).

I think it is wonderful that not everybody knows how common this level of abuse is, but please don't downplay the reality that many have faced. That shit is absolutely real, and even years ago when GPS came out on phones I was concerned about the ways in which abusers would use it. The fact that shelters feel the need to disable GPS on phones shows the real threat it can be, not only to the individual but to the other victims and the workers as well.

Smartphones are a tool to keep tabs on, and controlling, someone else (both location and who talks to whom and when and why) and I know the people who abused my mom and me would have each taken full advantage of the snooping and tracking that modern cell phones provide. If I meet a Luddite today I immediately wonder if they really don't want a facebook or if they just fear being found.

As someone who was constantly in and out of shelters as a kid (before cell phones) to hide from this level of crazy, I understand all too well how real this threat actually is. Maybe people aren't installing spyware at super high rates (and maybe that was your point to begin with), but the stalking and snooping for purposes of control are absolutely there, and the spyware is just one more tool in an ever-growing toolkit of easy and cheap technology.

On a related note, I urge everyone to actually get permission from each person before tagging them in a photo or tagging them at a location on social media. Don't just assume it's okay, you could actually be endangering someone. Also, not all camera shy people are afraid of looking bad - they, too, might be afraid to be seen/documented.

Okay, I am stepping off of my soap box now. Sorry for the rant. My paragraphs are all messed up, but I'm tired and going to bed.

A Lady Reveals Nothing said...

OH -- I'm very sorry -- the link was part of my roundup because it horrified me that this even exists and that any woman has had to deal with this -- especially the bit about being able to record conversations on the other end when the phone is dialed! -- however, after having read the comments on NPR it appeared that an iPhone would have to be unlocked for the program to be able to be installed, etc. If that were true, the article's point that a woman's abuser simply had to borrow her phone if she were in the shower seemed sensationalist to me.

The disclaimer was a way to say "this is freaking me right out, but I don't know if the average person needs to worry about this if they don't have a terrible abusive controlling person in their lives".

Also, in another comment on the NPR article a woman noted that a professor at her college several years ago was showing this spying product to the class and encouraging all of the students to put it on their children's phones. Apparently her son had been in some trouble and she felt she could have prevented it by spying on his phone. The Professor was so obsessed with the idea and pushed it so hard that the student became upset.

That scared the crap out of me too, having just finished The Circle by Dave Eggers.

The statement I made that it was "not really all that real" was only to match it up exactly with the additional link about microwaving -- continuity for writing style. Poor choice and I'm sorry.

I'll remove the comments because I agree with you 100%, and did not intend to make light of a very serious issue.

A Lady Reveals Nothing said...

...and then I should remove the comment about under 5 mortality being BLAH BLAH BLAH

Ugh I just realized I'm a total a-hole.

Jenny said...

Haha, no. That's why I love you and read this blog. But really, though - You can't please everybody, so don't go reevaluating what could possibly be offensive to people with personal connections to the topics. Unless that's what you want to do.Basically, you can yell at anyone to get off your lawn. And, if you offend us in the process, we'll probably love you more for it.

I do agree that the average person not in an abusive situation probably doesn't need to worry about it so much for their own life, but I think being aware of the issue is important. When I read that comment about the college professor enabling I got pretty pissed at her determination to maintain her ignorance. So, the woman has issues with her son and she can’t see past her own experienc… wait… damn it.

Apparently I need to never read The Circle. I might end up writing the author a letter about my feelings.

I apologize for hijacking your space. I never thought I’d be “one of those,” but I do appreciate you taking my comments seriously enough to evaluate beyond what your intent had been. It was clear even then that you intended no malice and was maybe just oblivious, at worst.

Does either of the following things make you feel better about feeling like an A-hole? Even on my high horse I'm an A-hole.

1) I totally appreciated the photo of the kids. Did not read article.

2) My secondary reaction to the NPR article was “of course this would be news to NPR listeners, they aren’t the demographic who would experience this.”

These comments today are making me reevaluate my sense of humor and sense of self.

Kady: offering anti-reading lists and life lessons. What a jerk.

Keep doing the Lord’s work. Now I am off to google what a Lord actually is and if there was a particular job associated with the title.

Anonymous said...

Hyacinth Bucket (pronounced Boo-kay)

Jenny: As I sit here surrounded by expensive wallpaper, waiting for a ring on my pearl white slimline telephone with last number redial - as I'm sure it will be the Vicar confirming my invitation for tea and light refreshments, I do believe, Dear, that you may have your knickers on too tightly.

Anonymous said...

Roxie said..

I love you Kady!!

You're not an A-hole! You're just a girl with a brilliant IQ struggling with senility.

Unknown said...

Your round ups are always very interesting. Thanks for adding the phone article. I'm thinking we should all go back to pearl white slim line telephones with last number redial to play it safe...

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