"I'm living proof of how stupid I get."
"We got a beautiful weekend...why are we wastin' it in here?"
"Now listen, you been tellin' me to shut up all night. It's my turn to tell YOU to SHUT UP."
...A couple weeks ago I was bartending and a large group came in just as I was about to call it a night and lock the doors. Dang. Anyway there were a couple different groups, actually, and Group A was celebrating the birthday of one of its members. Groups B, C, and D thought that was pretty awesome and there were rounds purchased and congratulations offered. And then somebody thought it would be a great idea to bust out the Happy Birthday song. When this very loud group got to the <insert name here> part, you know..."Happy Birthdaaay, deaaar ........" they just kinda did the hmmm hmmm because of course, nobody knew the guy's name. I saw it coming...I couldn't help myself...I screamed out "WHATS-YOUR-NAME" during the awkward silent pause.