New to A Lady Reveals Nothing? You've missed SO MUCH. Not to worry. Every Sunday, I dig through the archives to repost an old favorite. Mostly because I'm too lazy to come up with new content every single day. Enjoy! This story originally appeared on March 24, 2012:
Recently a friend told me a very awesome and humiliating story about going to the doctor for a gastrointestinal issue. Apparently the doctor or lab tech or whoever gave her a paint-bucket-type contraption to collect her number two and bring it back for "examination" the next day.
She was confused and asked him how full he wanted her to fill it. "Like, if it gets near the top, should I smoosh it down a bit? To get the top on? Maybe you should give me two paint buckets."
"No, you probably won't need two."
"You better give me two."
"I'll tell you what, if you need a second bucket you can come back and get a second bucket. But for now, just take the one home and use that."
This argument went on for several minutes and finally she got frustrated and went home. Exasperated, she complained to her husband that the dumb guy wouldn't just give her two buckets.
"How many times do you poop in a day?" Her husband asked.
She was so embarrassed she didn't go back the next day.
"Fill 'er up!"