Sunday, January 29, 2012

Sunday Favorites: The Toenail

New to A Lady Reveals Nothing?  You've missed SO MUCH.  Not to worry.  Every Sunday, I dig through the archives to repost an old favorite.  Mostly because I'm too lazy to come up with new content every single day.  Enjoy!  This story first appeared on October 14, 2010:

"I Risked my Life to Take This Photo"

I see so many problems with this kind of big toe nail. 

1)  Can't wear tennis shoes.
2)  Can't wear socks.
3)  Can't run in bare feet.
4)  Can't get that pesky pinky toenail to stay stuck on.
5)  Can't pee in a public restroom without having a photo of your foot taken.

In the end I was able to get a photo without much ado.  The worst part of this whole scenario is that my camera flashed.  I thought maybe I could get away with the sound only...but then the flash happened.  Not to mention that it is completely illegal to take photos in public restrooms.  (duh).  I pictured that lady getting up and then wiping and then kicking the crap out of me.  Without washing her hands first.  Cuz a lady with that kind of pedicure ain't messin' around.

I got a great comment on this original post, from Anonymous my friend Cory:

I done said...
Just think of the can do's: catch and then cut the head of a lizard. Really scratch the back of your knee good. Scratch someone else real good. Self defense comes to mind. Aids in swimming-more thrust. Point with big toe more accurately. Ahhh, create shade for a small insect. Place to put your gum whilst eating. Bare foot tap dance. I could go on but I think you get the point. 


Brittany said...

She's like a fancy female velociraptor!

MoxieJane said...

like whoa! thank you for risking it all to post this, and esp the sheer anxiety of the moment of the flash on your camera. i just spit out my coffee laughing. so glad i found your blog! made my day.

A Lady Reveals Nothing said...

This is why I always have my camera with me. You just never know.

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