When I was in fourth grade, I had to move from Holler Elementary to Falls Elementary, which was the equivalent of moving over to the right side of the tracks. Holler was a tiny school in South International Falls and it only went to third grade. So I had no choice but to get on the bus and go ALL the way to International Falls and be in Mrs. Berg's fourth grade class. And Mrs. Berg was mean. For some unknown reason, and maybe it was "new kid" syndrome, I started telling all kinds of lies. I remember two of them distinctly.
Mrs. Berg had a bulletin board at the back of the class and each week a kid was allowed to decorate it any way they wanted. I got chosen first, and because I am the sixth of seven kids, there were only probably four or five photos of me up until that point. So I posted my photos very sparcely across the bulletin board. Mrs. Berg even asked me if I wanted to put up more photos. "NO, that's OK," I replied as if I had just chosen the very BEST photos of myself from a vast supply. For some strange reason I opted to also bring in this huge trophy that my dad has with a horse on the top. Lie # 1: I told everyone that my dad won the trophy at a rodeo and he won it with me on the horse. Yes folks, my dad and I tamed those buckin' broncos together, back in the day. About a month ago I saw that trophy again when we were cleaning out my mom and dad's house and it says in very plain letters on the front "July 27, 1977". 47 days after I was born. I was a pretty CRAZY newborn.
p.s. nobody believed me.
p.p.s. Mary Frederickson decorated the board the next week and her stuff filled the board so much it was spilling over onto the wall.
Lie # 2: I guess I must have been embarrassed of my poor kid's clothes, and so I invented the story of the "box of Esprit clothes" under the basement stairs. Yah, I was just "too busy" to go through them all, and so there they sat, under the basement stairs. Someday I would "get around to it" and sort through all those Esprit clothes and finally wear some of it to school. In the meantime, I would just wear this old crap, no big deal. I still remember Tricia Wherley (whose dad owned Wherley Motors and who had TONS of actual Esprit clothes) reacting to the story with nonbelief and dismissal. A miracle happened that year when my aunt sent me some clothes from my cousin. In the package was an Esprit sweater. Which I then proceeded to wear every day. Tricia Wherley was indeed surprised. I still remember being in the bathroom at school and hearing somebody saying "She really does have Esprit clothes", and Tricia was astounded. Astounded.