Saturday, October 11, 2008

Flying

Favorite things about flying:

1. The plane usually is going somewhere cool.
2. The pride you feel when all you have is a tiny backpack and everybody else has huge wheeled luggage.
3. Walking around the airport feeling independent and cool being a lone traveler.
4. Being able to cure myself of ear-popping by holding my nose and blowing out my ears.
5. Farting, but knowing nobody would ever blame it on cute lil' me.
6. Day dreaming about a crash where I am the hero, and I selflessly help everyone out of the plane. Sometimes I die, but sometimes I become the surrogate mother of the baby I saved who had no other family.



Least favorite things about flying:

1. All the farting that goes on. SHEESH! Maybe the atmospheric pressure change causes gaseous noxiousicity to happen...I don't know but planes always smell like poo.
2. Sitting next to wide people who don't have the good sense to put their arms in front of them, rather than in my seat; when I clearly am leaning waaaaay over to make room for their dumb arm.
3. Poor little babies who cry the whole way.
4. Having to pay for ginger ale :(
5. Waking up and noticing that I had my head leaned back and my mouth open.
6. Waking myself up with a snort.
7. Having to pee so bad and the stupid fasten seat belt sign is ON THE WHOLE TIME.
8. Sitting next to ladies who think their perfume smells so good that they need to bathe in it.
9. Finding wads of hair in your hand when all you wanted was to find the seat belt that fell below the seat.
10. Day dreaming about the crash, and worrying that everybody will push past me and I will get stuck and burn to death.

4 comments:

mom said...

Kady, sorry but I think you are "broody". Hidden within your blogs are little hints of your broodiness. Sorry again, but there it is. Broody.

Anonymous said...

I have always imagined myself as the hero in school bus crashes. I never die, but I am in the hospital all pale in the bed and everyone I saved is worried and crying and I'm in a coma and then I wake up all covered in burns and I am a hero. Also, why don't you go to the bathroom even if the light is turned on? Or do you just not want to risk getting thrown to the ceiling and braking your neck and have the airline find your dead, naked, pee covered body three hours later? This is your niece by the way.:)

kadyhexum said...

Hanna, that is exactly why I don't go pee when the fasten seat belt sign is on.

I just don't want to die like that.

Not wanting to touch anything, but being thrown about the bathroom, probably landing with my head in the toilet because the plane flipped upside down over and over.

daydream, captains blog: continousingly said...

and then this boy i like, his name is mario. Comes over to my bed and gives me a mushroom and saves me from the dragonlike creature behind the bed and curtain next to me. I'm now the princess and i have 1up 1up 1up 1up 1up so I have five extra lives. Then I wake up and there is a frog on my pillow. I kiss it and then I am a princess. the frog stays a frog. "yarg a frog i's still is", says he. And then I marry a blind school teacher named adam. Then i'm blind. then a fire. adam's not blind. then he is. I hit my head, then i'm not blind. Or maybe i am. I can't remember cuz I hit my head. Pa goes to mankato to sell the wheat. takes laura and jack and albert and lindsey and able and miss beetle and mr. edards too. I save all of them from a burning buckboard in a burning barn in a burning town by a forest fire. me and doc baker and willy and nelly and mrs. olson. hero? or mild mannered child left to amagine a situation in which different worlds meet in an unlikely meeting place called the "Blog Zone"

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